The freedom we chase

"The freedom we crave often reveals the places where we are most wounded."

It dawned on me today, the freedom I was chasing was where I was most wounded.

I sat and reflected: There are some who chase freedom. And some who chase control.

Both are trying to fill a space left by an old wound.

For me, I didn’t want to be still, I had spent too long chained to a life that wasn’t mine. When I left a controlling marriage, I vowed never to be trapped again.

But what I couldn’t see at the time was this: I was still allowing it. Quietly, subtly.

In friendships. In relationships. In moments where I tolerated more than I realised, not because I was trying to please, but because I treated people how I wanted to be treated.

But some people are wired to control, often without knowing it. And those of us who chase freedom can become addicted to the chase itself.

We tell ourselves we’re protecting something precious, our independence, our space, our sense of self. But if we’re honest, the running often comes from fear.

The wound is what drives it!

And that wound can only heal when we stop running or stop trying to control what cannot be controlled.

Today I realised, I don’t need to chase freedom anymore. Not through friendships. Not through movement. Not through proving anything to anyone.

Freedom was always within me. It was the wound that kept me looking outward.

So maybe pause and ask yourself: What are you chasing? And what wound might be underneath it?

Because once we heal, we no longer have to chase anything. We simply are free.